Mainey ek baar commitment kar diya to mai khud kee bhee nahi sunta.
Fourth day of 30 days.
Was busy doing too many exciting things. Didn't get time to write. I believe small detours are good. A road map may be useful to explore new places. But its never good enough to direct you to the unknown. A discovery is whats not there on the map. The unwritten. The forbidden. The brave and the unknown. That one is scared of...and is also excited about.
I did many new things last few days. Flew out of Mumbai to meet my Uncle and Aunt for three days. Celebrated Bengali Nobo Borsho with my Jethu and Jethima. Ate Pabda Maacher jhal, Mocha bhaaja, Chochori, Doi Maach, Maacher paatla jhol, Mishti doi, Kachcha golla and the works. Drank a very passionate red wine and had a heart to heart with my cousin Mimi. Thats not a first with her.
What was first was the book of family photographs she had designed and gifted her father on his b'day. Beautiful book of nostalgia. We spoke about her Andaman trip with her kids. How her kids who are being home schooled finished a diving course. Her underwater trip. I am putting two photographs clicked by Mimi Chakrabarti.
Mimi is a good photographer, yoga teacher, home maker, daughter and a very creative mother. She loves to climb mountains, swim deep waters, sing songs...what a passionate woman.
Spent substantial time with an ex who is clearly a very special guy. A very dear friend now. He was unwell. It was a first for me...the way we have transcended to a fine friendship. No big fights. No bittreness. Small disappointments and a lot of sadness... but the realization that we can still nurture a fine friendship is a revelation. I was unaware of my own emotional resources. Good to see I have grown.
I swam again today. Early in the morning. This was after a glass of cinnamon water, two eggs and a slice of bread. I am so royally impressed with myself. Healthy Diet, workout, sleep are three things I will stick to in my 30 days project. Everything else can be new.
A bunch of kids between 4 and 10 years of age were there in the pool. Innocent, playful voices can change a day. The water was warm and soothing. Sun was swimming with me often. I swam for over an hour and realised I swim well when I am alone. WELL as in I thoroghly enjoy the water.
As I swam back and forth meditatively I realised one thing yet again. Need to be careful about who walks in and out of my intimate space. I am going to be very focussed about what I want. You have to be really generous and kind to fit into my scheme of things. I am perfectly fine on my own otherwise. And as my head came out to breathe I noticed purple leaves on the top of the blue water. I was swimming under a layer of flowers and leaves. I was swimming in fragrant waters...
OHHH yes may be the above thoughts are product of a very vital meeting that I had in Delhi. I met up with my eleven students. They now get tutored in a coaching school. Three of them are in class tenth. This time around I noticed their voices are cracking. They have grown taller but their hugs are just as tight and warm as ever. I miss them a lot.
When my flight landed last night in mumbai...I knew the course of my life...I knew what I needed to do the most...
...My life will revolve around my students.
And just then I realised...I have so much to live for...and so much to do...